Submitted by DontDrinkAndShit (Some City, Some State) on 11.21.12
I used to sleep in a school boarding house and as you can imagine we tried all kind of stupid stuff.
Once we dranc hard alcohol (i think it was a bottle of gin and a vodka). Completely inexperienced we kept dinking.
Then we went back to the boarding house and after that I don't know much.
Next day however I woke up in a bed (not even mine). First thing I noticed was that I felt really great but then
I noticed something else...
I checked with my hand and holy CRAB!
such a fat load and I started to panic. But then i got my SHIT together and started to clean up.
Good thing was that it was quite early and the others were all sleeping. So i went to the toilet and droped my pants and stuffed it into the toilet.
Unfortunately underpants are not ment to fit through a toilet drain and the whole toilet started to fill itself with water.
I grabbed the WC brush and started using it like a
plumber's friend.
I ended up plumbing for half an hour until i forced my pants down the toilet.
After that I noticed that I am naked in the toilet and so I snuck out of it into the bathroom where I took a shower. It took me some time until I was clean again (such a sticky stuff i can tell)
Then I went beck to the bed and stuffed the sheets into a trash bag and turned the mattress.
Then my roommate woke up and he immediately knew whats going on. He started to laugh...
However he promised not to tell anybody (wich he did after 2 years)
Then i rushed to the garbage place to get rid of the shit sheets. Half the hallway down a girl called me and asked me what the hell I have done. With the "crab-bag" in my hands I told her that I have no fucking clue. And then she told me...
Apparently I got hungry the night before and I went down to the kitchen where I ended up sleeping on the carpet until the adviser took me up to the room - AGAIN
And that's the story. After that I could not look the eyes of my advisor. I was kinda happy when she got fired one week after that - should I feel bad?
Most awkward day in my life - I never drank that much ever again
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