Submitted by Gary Newman (Some City, Some State) on 07.31.14

Well, I was headed to my desk to work on an update when a horrid funk reached my small intestine and grumbled so loud and hard my chair shook a little. This was an emergency that could not be held. The turd couldnt be stopped it was like my turd was the Persians and my intestine was the persians.. It could not hold much longer. I quickly sprang to my feet and waddled so fast I ran into people to not disturb the slaughter of my pants. I was too late, the spartans fell, and the shit started to leak, but not before a loud *POP* along with a silent but deadly *pffftttbllrrbb* I simply could not let any more through. Right before I reached the handle of the now praisable toilet room, it happened. There was about 7 people watching... Following a rectum burp all they heard and smelled was *bbrrrp.. burrrppppffffttblrb* The chunky beef stew ran down my legs and a foul odor had me frozen, I could not move. The carpet had corn stains and nugget chunks all over it by now. I could have sworn I heard a woman gasp, and when she did, she reverted to a stomach hurdle of vomit and swear words.... It finally stopped. Yet I still could not move as the seepage crusted all over my legs, my days of popularity ended in one single moment.

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 296 Not So Much 298

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