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Welcome to Oops I shit myself! If you've just shit your pants, for god's sake, clean yourself up!

But after you get back, tell us all about it to the right...


Submitted by Gary Newman (Some City, Some State) on 07.31.14

Well, I was headed to my desk to work on an update when a horrid funk reached my small intestine and grumbled so loud and hard my chair shook a little. This was an emergency that could not be held. The turd couldnt be stopped it was like my turd was the Pe (Full Story) Well, I was headed to my desk to work on an update when a horrid funk reached my small intestine and grumbled so loud and hard my chair shook a little. This was an emergency that could not be held. The turd couldnt be stopped it was like my turd was the Persians and my intestine was the persians.. It could not hold much longer. I quickly sprang to my feet and waddled so fast I ran into people to not disturb the slaughter of my pants. I was too late, the spartans fell, and the shit started to leak, but not before a loud *POP* along with a silent but deadly *pffftttbllrrbb* I simply could not let any more through. Right before I reached the handle of the now praisable toilet room, it happened. There was about 7 people watching... Following a rectum burp all they heard and smelled was *bbrrrp.. burrrppppffffttblrb* The chunky beef stew ran down my legs and a foul odor had me frozen, I could not move. The carpet had corn stains and nugget chunks all over it by now. I could have sworn I heard a woman gasp, and when she did, she reverted to a stomach hurdle of vomit and swear words.... It finally stopped. Yet I still could not move as the seepage crusted all over my legs, my days of popularity ended in one single moment.

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 24 Not So Much 19


Submitted by The African shitter (Brandon, MS) on 07.29.14

I was playing soccer at a highschool with my friends and the three pizzas that I are caught up to me. While holding in my shit for 45 minutes frantically looking for a bathroom, I finally just shit on the parking lot in front of all my friends. They laughe (Full Story) I was playing soccer at a highschool with my friends and the three pizzas that I are caught up to me. While holding in my shit for 45 minutes frantically looking for a bathroom, I finally just shit on the parking lot in front of all my friends. They laughed their ass off at me and the worst part is, I found a bathroom after I shit myself

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 28 Not So Much 17


Submitted by Ammaie (CT, UT) on 07.28.14

I was just at school then I farted and I felt really Wierd at the end of school I realised i shit myself I was like dammnnn!!

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 18 Not So Much 18


Submitted by faggothomo45 (Some City, Some State) on 07.27.14

well, one time i was in a hotel and they ran out of pepto bismol, and let me tell you, it was a shit storm in there. the neighbors called the front desk to make sure i was ok.

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 22 Not So Much 15


Submitted by Shitty Pants (Long Island, NY) on 07.22.14

I went for a walk with my wife, baby and dog. Over a mile away from the house I realized I had a major storm brewing....major cramping, nausea, sweats. Needless to say the trek back towards the homestead was no fun. I made it all the way to the front ya (Full Story) I went for a walk with my wife, baby and dog. Over a mile away from the house I realized I had a major storm brewing....major cramping, nausea, sweats. Needless to say the trek back towards the homestead was no fun. I made it all the way to the front yard but forget to keep my asshole clenched....I began to unleash the largest, diarrhea bomb in history right then and there. I began to run towards my house as diarrhea came down my legs...I was wearing shorts...wonder if the neighbors saw. I quickly opened the door to the kitchen as shit began to fly out of my shorts leg and all over the floor. I attempted to make it to the bathroom but I forgot the dog outside. Quickly I let her in, stripped naked and rushed to the bathroom. Mind you I had left the largest pile of diarrhea on the floor and next to it my shit covered clothes. There was so much shit in my shorts that it came around the front and covered me all the way to my belly button. I sat down on the toilet and made a mess with my shitty ass. I had nothing left as I had unleashed all of my bowels already and then I then hopped in the shower to wash myself off. When I was done I came out to see my wife's face aghast with her jaw hanging low (I walked as fast as I could to get home to attempt to shit leaving my wife and child behind). I then began the process of cleaning up the most immense shit mess in history...there was a lot. I threw my clothes out and used an entire roll of paper towels just to pick up all of the diarrhea off the kitchen floor. I then used 5 swiffer wet jet pads to clean up the remaining mess. I almost forgot to mention the joy of cleaning the toilet seat of all my shit and having to wash shit down the shower drain as it rinsed off of my body. The best part was realizing my cell phone was in my shit covered shorts which was at the bottom of the garbage bag...under a pile of shit covered paper towels and wet jet pads. I proceeded to retrieve my cell phone and then lay in bed ashamed. That lasted all of 5 minutes. I now am typing this story as I googled "I shit my pants"...I highly recommend some of the youtube videos..they will cheer you up. This story is 100% true.

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 30 Not So Much 18


Submitted by Poopenheimer (worcester, uk, Some State) on 07.18.14

Mistook bowel obstruction pills for aspirin on a majpr hangover. Half hour later my underwear were sprayed with faeces and no small amount of blood. Had to drink so much water to counter dehydration effects

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 16 Not So Much 19


Submitted by aspie (bournemouth, Some State) on 07.17.14

Being an Adult Baby I just pooed my nappy, and I am not planning on changing till tomorrow morning. The reason being autistic I have sensory issues, so I get some sensory input from wearing and using diapers. I used to be incontinent and was late potty tra (Full Story) Being an Adult Baby I just pooed my nappy, and I am not planning on changing till tomorrow morning. The reason being autistic I have sensory issues, so I get some sensory input from wearing and using diapers. I used to be incontinent and was late potty training I think that is how a began using diapers for sensory need.

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 26 Not So Much 16


Submitted by NICKTHEPM (Nashville, TN) on 07.13.14

I am sitting in my Sr. Leaderships office. I tell a stupid joke that he did not get, so I panic and basically tell him that I shit on myself on a regular basis. I am pretty sure my promotion is in the shitter now!

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 25 Not So Much 15


Submitted by OhNoOhNo (Calgary, Some State) on 07.12.14

My friend made us some brownies and we took it to the movies with us. I ate the whole thing (she only ate pieces of it). About 40 min left of the movie I could feel my stomach cramping and gassy.

I am not telling her anything because I thought it was j (Full Story) My friend made us some brownies and we took it to the movies with us. I ate the whole thing (she only ate pieces of it). About 40 min left of the movie I could feel my stomach cramping and gassy.

I am not telling her anything because I thought it was just going to be a regular shit. Nope. She went to the bathroom. Then took her sweet as time driving me to my car. I am only 10 minutes away from my house and I really thought I could make it.

As soon as I sit down in my car the shit starts coming out, I am just trying so hard to keep it in. And then it starts. I couldn't believe that I was shitting myself.

I'll never look at brownies the same ever again.

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 22 Not So Much 14


Submitted by shitter boi (philly, PA) on 07.10.14

Took a shit on a toilet like a regular person, didn't completely wipe my asshole (i have a big ass and large hands so its difficult... don't judge!) and i had the itchy butt. so I go to "adjust" a little bit and THOOOOMP! I shit myself!!!!

Vote:Yeah! You Shit the *Shit* out of yourself! 26 Not So Much 16


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